Tagged: Fans

Piazzaobsession … leads to arrest

I’m not a reporter, but I play one on XBox

"Mr. Leli, 18, had worshiped the Mets since age 3 and was a huge fan of Mike Piazza, the catcher, even after he left the Mets a year ago for San Diego.

Mr. Leli’s other passion was celebrity-chasing. A drama student, he relied on sharp clothes, acting skills and general charm to infiltrate movie sets and film premieres, meeting the likes of Tom Cruise and Sean Combs. He would post photographs of himself with the stars on his personal page on MySpace.com.

So that August afternoon, Mr. Leli did what any overenthusiastic Piazza fan might fantasize about: He created a fake press pass that fooled Shea officials and gained access to the visiting team’s clubhouse, where Mr. Piazza was being interviewed by a scrum of reporters."

"Mr. Leli’s line of questioning — especially the request that Mr. Piazza pose for a photo with him — annoyed a Padres official, who had him ejected.

Mr. Leli tried the same trick a week later, when the Mets played the Colorado Rockies. This time, he was stopped by detectives at the press entrance and arrested."

"In court, Mr. Leli examined a reporter’s press pass and wrinkled his nose. “Not bad,” he said, “but mine was better.”

“He’s always been my hero, and I just wanted to meet him,” Mr. Leli said.

"His mother, Denise, interjected, “He had no idea he was doing anything that wrong and he just wanted to hang out with Piazza and the Mets"

Mr. Leli, for his part, complained that the video camera he had used to film Mr. Piazza had been seized as evidence and not returned.   “I want that camera back,” he said. “My prom pictures are in there.”

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Dear Mr. Leli …. did you not get a chance to meet Mr. Piazza at a card show or similar event during the 7 years he played at Shea?  And as for your camera … "reporters" don’t need cameras … they have cameramen for that job.

Dear Mr. Leli’s mom …. you didn’t think your son’s impersonating a reporter and entering a restricted area was … at the least …. foolish? 

All the post-life runs will be “Urned”

For the ultimate "diehard" fan

"Many crazed baseball fans have said they would die for a championship. But are they willing to take that devotion to the grave? Major League Baseball and a company that makes funeral products will soon find out just how many fans want to be decked out for all eternity in tribute to their team.

Starting next season, fans of the New York Yankees, Boston Red Sox, Detroit Tigers, Philadelphia Phillies, Chicago Cubs and Los Angeles Dodgers will be able to have their ashes put in an urn or head six feet under in a casket emblazoned with their team colors and insignia.

MLB has entered a licensing agreement with Eternal Image, which hopes to eventually make urns and caskets for all 30 teams."

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… so will you be able to be buried 60 feet 6 inches under?

Might as well jump (d’oh!)

Remember the stupid fan who jumped onto the homeplate screen at Yankee Stadium last year.  Well, he got what he deserved …

Failing your screen test gets you 3 years probation nowadays

"A baseball fan who jumped from the upper deck at Yankee Stadium onto the netting behind home plate was sentenced Tuesday to three years probation.

Scott Harper, 19, of Armonk, N.Y., pleaded guilty in August to reckless endangerment following last season’s plunge at the stadium in the Bronx. He was banned for life from the ballpark by state Supreme Court Judge Troy Webber."

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Have fun watching the Yankees on cable Scott ….

Getting in touch with his feminine side (and his lawyer)

Shrink raps Angels on giveaways

A man who was denied a red nylon tote bag during a Mother’s Day promotion at an Angels baseball game has filed a sex and age discrimination lawsuit against the team.
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… because he was trying for the "most frivilous lawsuit of the year"

The class action claim filed by Michael Cohn, a Los Angeles psychologist, alleges that thousands of males and fans under age 18 are entitled to $4,000 in damages each because they were treated unequally at last May’s promotion. Women over 18 received the gifts.
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perhaps if he had dressed up in drag

… and what about those under 18 who don’t get Angels "shaving kits" …. should they get lawyers too?

Angel officials said Cohn was the only person who complained about the giveaway and that the team is proud of its promotions.
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Angel officials also stated Mr. Cohn needs to get a life …

"Historically, we have tried to appeal on those special days that might be nationally noted holidays or special occasions," team spokesman Tim Mead said, adding he could not comment directly on the suit because he hadn’t seen it. "We have tailored programs or giveaways accordingly."

The team responded to a complaint letter that Cohn wrote last June by sending him four tote bags and a letter stating the team "ran out of the item that day and had to order more." "They claimed they didn’t have any more bags, but my client said there was a mountain of bags stacked so high a show dog couldn’t have jumped over them," said Alfred Rava, Cohn’s San Diego-based attorney.
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A male or female show dog? … What if the dog was taking canine growth hormone?

Cohn could not be reached for comment.
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Because he was checking out his gynecomastia condition
Gynecomastia

This weekend’s Mother’s Day promotion will offer tote bags to the first 25,000 fans over age 18, rather than cater specifically to women.
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Thanks to Mr. Cohn, I guess the men will get the "Motherf***er’s Day" gift

Mead would not say whether the change was in response to Cohn’s complaint. Rava said the altered promotion still violates the civil rights of fans under age 18.
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Attention Mr. Cohn …. if your under-18 daughter comes to you and says she is pregnant, I hope your first thought is NOT "great …. now she won’t be able to get a Mother’s Day gift at the Angels game!"

Cohn’s suit names as defendants the Angels and the Corinthian Colleges, which sponsored the event through an affiliate.
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And the Angels should countersue this idiot ….

Law and Order: Long-Term Grudge-holding

Its like …. totally tubular … you know?

A local college student with a longtime grudge against Barry Bonds was arrested Monday night for tossing what was characterized as a tube of toothpaste at the Giants slugger while he was standing in left field during the fourth inning.

Mark Greggersen, 23, of nearby Show Low, Ariz., was booked into the Maricopa County jail on the charge of disorderly conduct, the Arizona Diamondbacks reported during the Giants’ 10-9 win at Chase Field.

"My problems with Barry Bonds started long before steroids," Greggersen told a reporter from the East Valley Tribune, who found the Mesa Community College student in the left-field bleachers. "It was the lack of an autograph for a 7-year-old."

Greggersen, who was wearing a necklace with a syringe dangling from it, said Bonds hadn’t given him an autograph during a long-ago Spring Training game.
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Would this be a case of "Tubal Litigation"?

No no no …. the pitchers’ AGES topped 100, not their fastballs

The REALLY Old Timers Game

"(Violet) Lynam and seven other earthquake survivors from San Francisco’s 1906 Great Quake and fires threw out the ceremonial first pitches before the Giants’ home opener against the Atlanta Braves on Thursday, receiving a warm standing ovation from the sellout crowd."

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If Lynam had only started using "the cream" and "the clear" a little earlier in her life …